Usually when I post an article it is a game review or some sort of insight into a system. Today is going to be a little bit more about discussion. We all know that dice are evil. All dice. They are out to KILL your characters without remorse. Most of us have probably seen the new “dice shaming” trend that went around the internet for awhile, and for many people that may work out okay. Not for me. For some reason my dice will roll just fine for everyone else, but for me they roll terribly. It has become a running joke within my group that I am not allowed to touch any dice besides my own because they will be cursed with low rolls because they contacted me.
Let me give you a little bit of insight into my “luck” with dice. My first ever character was a bit of an alcoholic. By that I mean whenever there was alcohol he would drink. A lot. I don’t just mean a lot by normal standards. I mean he was a 250 pound, 6 foot 4 inch dragon born paladin, and he drank a lot. Now, you would think that he would be pretty good in drinking contests right? It would make sense. +3 to constitution saves isn’t half bad! In comes a half-elf cleric. 5 foot 6 inches. 160 pounds. +1 constitution. Not much of a challenge right? Wrong. We ordered the strongest drink they had (called Goliath’s Breath) and went for it. First drink was handed out and we rolled. She got a natural 20. I got a natural 1. So my woes began. We had four more drinking contests and I lost every single one due to bad rolls. Well, except for one. Because I had a magical affect that prevented me from being drunk. That I didn’t know about.
This trend would continue throughout that campaign and into the next. I played a dwarven monk. Monks, if you don’t know, roll a lot of attacks. We had a very combat heavy session and we were all rolling plenty of attacks. At the end of the night I had rolled seven, seven, natural 1s. It was almost as if Wil Wheaton has #blessed me with his own rolling ability! (If you don’t get that reference please go watch a few episodes of TableTop over on Geek & Sundry‘s website. You won’t regret it.) Luckily everyone else in the game rolled pretty well, and we were victorious in our endeavors.
So now I want to ask all of you. What are some of your dice-central horror stories? Is it just you or the dice you use? Let us know in the comments or on twitter by tagging us @nblogcollective or by giving me a shout out @skunkosourous!
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